avocadobaby

( count your cloud patterns like sheeps on the meadow )
yesterday night was amazingly surreal- carrefour dinner at the marina barrage, everything felt so displaced yet it fit, i twirled about and leaped on the parapet and felt like I WAS THE KING OF THE CASTLE till both of them asked me to STOP YOU'RE GONNA FALL ON SOMEONE but i felt like we were floating on this cloud that was tittering on bursting but the heavens had mercy on us and gave us chilly breezy 25degree weather, just right enough for us to huddle together on our tablecloth mat bodies against the cold dewy earth and sing songs lying on our back and choking on our own saliva, staring at the amazing round moon, it was hearts all over the world because almost every picture i took with my camera with the skyline lights as the backdrop turned into perfectly shaped tiny little hearts and i knew last night was something magical. sort of like the feeling you get from the little kinder surprise you get when biting down on the thin soggy chocolate egg, sort of like how you feel when you read an accurate horoscope, sort of like stealing a kiss when no body's watching, sort of like a friday night, sort of like turning out what you want from the tonk tonk capsule machine.

I LOVE MY LIFE WITH THEM AND WITHOUT SCHOOL

love should never get to the point of stranglation, entanglement, nor should it be any where near "i can't live without you". the limit should only be "my life will be bleak without you, incomplete" but never mention of Non-existance. the thought of that (over)reliance scares and shames me. for what will you be as a single person, a half of something?

how should i explain this? i've never felt so close to myself since being out of a relationship. at the beginning i felt displaced, helpless, aimless almost. it took me awhile to get back on track, but you know what? it is good. and i won't be needing that ill reliance love, for a long long time.

i cannot stand this. how can you expect your dad to do ur bloody homework just because you don't have time, and then still have the cheek to question this and that, and make unnecessary demands? you're in POLY already, practically an adult. knowing your work load you shld bloody prioritise, or just take the responsibility or whatever punishment that comes your way if you dont complete it. even if you were in primary school, on no grounds should ur parents have to take the responsibility to complete your work. i'm fuming mad, because this kinda behavior is DISGUSTING, and ashamed because i know that the upbringing probably fueled it, and sad because this is all there is to his life. taking advantage of situations and manipulating people.

had a long needed toxic sleep and super filling home cooked meal today, still in the midst of planning my itinary for viet. i'm finding a way to extend my trip, but 10th will be the earliest i can get back, and i can't miss school? but i want to travel north to Ha Long bay. HCMC seems just like singapore without the manufactured culture which is good, but i still need a country getaway. this is exciting, the prospect of travelling alone.

i shall pack my room tonight.

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europe for exchange? but where? (grace, this is a cue for you to help me in my decision) i need to decide soon. so that i can find something to fuel my expenses.
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credits: amanda lam

finally, a picture of me with the world's yummiest popsicle, we walked 40 minutes in the 42 degree blazing sun for this, i had 3 of them.

if there is one thing i cannot stand in this world, it is slipshod work, and shitty groupmates. as much as how i am such a procrastinator, leaving work till the last minute, i would never ever hand in work that i think is shitty. can't believe some people, year 4 already still like that. anyways, i just realised i'm constantly torn between both sides of me- the perfectionist in me wants the work done immaculately and on time, scheduled, and the procrastinator in me puts off work till the last minute, is the cause of my pigsty room, etc etc. possessing both opposite traits suck cos im constantly having cognitive dissonance. aiyoh!.

i just realised i forgot to change one MCQ answer yesterday. URGHHH

WEE HEEEEEEEEE

i love my new layout. avocado babies jumping off the diving board. i made it! cute not. did unproductive things like this again. but gosh, my brain is too saturated with sociology stuff. i get sweaty palms reading about meat cutting industry can you believe it! thank goodness we split the 12 weeks of readings between us three for summary compilation, it probably saves me tonnes of time. i HAVE YET TO START ON MR, which is on thursday.

i'm stuck with only 4 mods, 2 psych. think im gonna pass out when studying for exams next sem.

salon pas and chocolate raisins are my saving grace. need to chiong.